Or at least I'm sort of done. I went in yesterday and Jennifer disconnected me from the pump for the last time. I thought I would be so excited and feel like I had reached a milestone but I don't. I just feel like I'm off the leash for the next two months to let the chemo get out of my system and then the testing starts again: pet scan or cat scan, colonoscopy plus time for well woman exams to make sure nothing new has cropped up in that area since my last one. Maybe once I've had all the new tests run with good results I'll feel relieved. I wonder if the threat of cancer will always be like an albatross around my neck and if I'll be second guessing every little twinge that pops up, wondering if it's a harbinger of worse things to come.
Okay, I need to get out of these doldrums today. I'm done! No more chemo! Praise God. Numb digits and nose bleed today but after next week, it's all recovery. I know that it'll be less and less nausea, less and less time on the couch. Time to restore and rebuild what I lost while the chemo was killing off the cancer.
"Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard. Then you will call and the Lord will answer, you will cry for help, and he will say; Here I AM."
Isaiah 58:8,9
Okay, I think I'm feeling better. Funny how God's word can change things in an instant. How awesome to know he's there regardless, to feel the fear disappear and the relief that I was seeking suddenly appear.
Thank You, Father. Thank You.
I'm so grateful for all You do for me every day. I thank You for another glorious day in which to enjoy living. I give You all the praise, honor and glory for guiding me through this process of healing. I thank You for guiding me to the right doctors even though it took a long route. I thank You for guiding me to the scriptures I need daily to get through this with the spirit of healing and gratitude that I should have. I ask Your forgiveness for my whining and self pity when so many are enduring much worse than I can even imagine.
I ask Your healing care and comfort today for Lisa as she goes through another procedure to defeat the enemy we call cancer.
These things I ask in the name of Jesus Christ, the name above all names.
Amen
I liked the verse from Isaiah.
ReplyDeleteHe is there indeed!
Please don't stop blogging!
I may be selfish, but it has become my little prayer meeting every am.
Even when you were too sick to write, I channeled you and we prayed together.
Merry Christmas!
gracie