Day 86 Don't Worry - Be Happy

My second chemo is scheduled for Tuesday.  I started without the most important part of the chemo cocktail last week because I thought I couldn't pay for it.  Then yesterday I decided that I can pay for it.  I'm not sure how at this point but I have enough to at least get started.  Then I received a call that the main foundation I was counting on for copay assistance that it is now out of funds.  I immediately was sick at my stomach and tried desperately not to cry over the phone as a feeling of hopelessness washed over me.  Once off the phone I did have a cry and an angry rant.  I know that cancer is not the only enemy out there that I am fighting but I can tell you, I am up for this fight.
I did regroup then and got back to business.

God is so good.  This morning I opened Daily Word and the heading was this:

               "LIFE WORKS BETTER WHEN I WORRY LESS AND PRAY MORE."

Oh, thank You, Father.  You always know exactly what it is that I need.

Next is to get all of my applications for assistance completed.  They seem to just go on and on but everything in the studio is in a hold position and there's no room for me to start anything new until I clear some of the finished paintings out, so I'll do what I need to be doing today and that's finding money.  I know it's out there. 

"Can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your span of life?"  Luke 12:25

I've faced this money battle before.  Anyone who is self employed can probably identify.  It's usually feast or famine but as long as I stay busy and productive, God will see that it all works itself out. 
For three days I've been very productive in the studio.  This morning I sent out Jo Edwards Fine Art Newsletter to my collectors letting them know that I've had to cancel my shows for the rest of the year and asking if they would consider again investing in one of my paintings.  If anyone following would like to see some of my work, you can go to my website at www.texasgalgallery.com  and I have smaller pieces offered on www.myotherstore.etsy.com .   If you would like to receive my monthly art newsletter with the new pieces that I'm working on, just send me your email address at jo@texasgalgallery.com . 

Yesterday on FB, someone posted a pic of a beautiful cancer victor in all her bald glory and with a caption to the effect that the prettiest curve on a woman is her smile.  That picture just really inspired me.  I have painted a series in the past that I called "Whisper Portraits".  They are watercolor portraits with rice paper collaged over and then glazed giving them a sort of ethereal quality.  This started me thinking about a series of portraits of other cancer victors without their hair and painted with the same technique.  I do have some of the Whisper Portraits on www.myotherstore.etsy.com .  Take a look and let me know what you think. 

So, moving forward is what I'm about today.  No worries, no concerns.  I know that I am taken care of already.  It may require lots of effort on my part and I'm up for that.  And I know that I know that I know that whatever is going on, God is overseeing it for the right and best outcome.  And I am grateful.

Father God, I am so grateful for all You do for me every minute of every day.  I thank You for the strength and determination to fight this enemy, even if it comes at me from more than one front.  I don't care.  With You on my side, I'm up for this battle. 
Please forgive my momentary doubts and weaknesses.  I know that I have Your favor and grace and that You have me in the palm of Your hand today.
I am asking Lord that you extend that same confidence to everyone else fighting this same enemy.  Give them the comfort of knowing that they know that they know. 
I love You Lord.  I love You.  It's all You Father.  All You.
In Jesus' precious name, the name above all names.
Amen